Can You Love Your Natural Hair and Still Enjoy Experimenting ?

If you have been around me for some time you will know that i am a huge fan of natural hair and hair care products. Although I love experimenting with extensions, wigs, weaves , straightening etc, I always come back to my natural kinky hair. It’s usually single twists and up in a bun. Buns are my go do!! This is a personal preference. I and this is not to say that expect everyone to wear their hair naturally. I will continue to do what’s best for me so i expect others to do the same. It’s a choice.  

I absolutely hate when I have a wedding or have some type of event to go to and the first question someone would ask is if I’m going to straighten my hair. It’s almost that they are saying that wearing your hair straight is the only way for it to look good. When people ask me this question I almost purposefully pick a hairstyle that is not straight just so I can show them that I can look good in any hair style I choose to do . It’s like my silent way of protesting and standing up for my right to choose how I want to wear my hair. If i want to straighten my hair i will. Who are you to tell me how I should wear my hair? Ladies (and guys) do you feel me? 

As I write this article my currently my favourite hairstyle id Faux Locs. Lightweight Crochet Faux Locs using hair by Mayde Beauty Braid (Wavy Island Locs 14″).  I love this hair because it was easy to install and easy to maintain

My current products that i’m using 

  • ORS Olive oil Wrap/ Set Mouse
  • Eco Styler Gel for the edges
  • DYI hair oil mixture
  • Cantu Leave-in Conditioner

Current faux locs maintenance routine 

Once a week wash the hair, especially the front where I apply some gel. I also oil my scalp with my DIY oil mixture and apply some oil directly on the hair as well. Add some leave in conditioner to my hair. Trim the ends that are frizzy so it stays looking neat. 

Hope this helps

So the moral is to wear your hair that way you want and they way you feel the most confident. Don’t let people’s opinions dictate how you should wear your hair. Its on your body. Enjoy it!

-Love always

Joelle@stills of hue

What are you thoughts about trying new hair styles?

Important Steps to Emotional Security

It’s OK to be selfish

Hello, Lovelies,

Today’s post will be a bit different and is a topic that has been weighing heavily on me as of late, I guess being stuck inside during this pandemic has really brought some things into perspective.  So, I’m going to rant.

I have always believed that I was rather secure in my thought processes. I’ve always leaned towards being a ‘cut and dry’ sort of person and to me, that was my ultimate protection. I’ve always hated those “we need to talk” scenarios. For the life of me  I could not understand why others weren’t able to live and let go the way I was. My process was simple:

It happened, I didn’t like it, but it’s over now, move forward…

or similarly:

They did this to me, I didn’t like it, but it’s over now so move forward… 

But lately, I’ve come to the realization that this “I have to move forward” mentality was only a temporary Band-Aid for me and a permanent solution for those who have done wrong to me.

I’ve allowed them to feel like they were perfect, while they openly criticized my shortcomings. 

Here’s the thing, I’ve always been the quiet type. If life was a movie, I’d be the lighting director- gleefully shining the light on others in hopes of deflecting the limelight off of myself. My comfort is in the background. 

I’ve had moments of front and center action but  I promise it was not comfortable. Now I’m not ashamed of being a wallflower, I’ve grown to be rather proud of it, in fact, it allowed me to see things in people that  I ultimately used to protect myself. I didn’t need to wait for a ‘falling out’ to see their bad characteristics-I happily took the queues no one thought I’d notice to build a wall of protection around myself.  

But the toll that can take is exhausting.

I felt like a mental contortionist, twisting and weaving. It was infuriating that some people that were close to me weren’t able to see how hard I worked at making them feel like their contributions mattered, while they would outwardly state that my efforts weren’t enough.

While thinking of all these things and replaying scenarios in my head, I realized that I was always going to be walking on eggshells to avoid emotional outbursts from some of those around me…I’m no longer available for such things. 

I’m getting too old to carry the baggage of others.

I’ll be all about self-love first, call it selfish if you must.

So, for this season become unburdened and most importantly, find those who can stand by your side through  thick and thin those who understand your quirks and make you laugh despite them. You may win some relationships and you may lose some, but life goes on… it has to.

Let’s move forward.

Love Always,

Allyson @stillsofhue

Can you Relate to this?

Recharge and Refresh

Now let’s be honest life can be busy. If you ask me how my day was, sometimes I just give a one word response. Most of the time it’s “Busy”. Why? Because the thought of explaining how my day was is exhausting. I feel kind of bad because I know the person can be looking for a way to connect and have a conversation but Im too tired to talk.  

I’m sure I’m not the only one that feels this way.  There is always the next thing that you have to work on and the next thing that needs your attention. Sometimes you are laying there with absolutely no energy to get up and do the simplest thing like brushing your teeth. It’s not like you have to go run a mile to get to the sink. It’s literally 15 seconds away. You go over in your head the action of standing up walking to the bathroom, putting toothpaste on your toothbrush and brushing your teeth etc. For a second you think, man, I wish someone could brush my teeth for me. You are fine going over the actions in your head but when it comes to actually doing it you have no energy. 

You ask yourself why do I feel so tired. This was the longest week of my life. When I get to this point I realize that something is not right and I’m literally irritated and everyone about the slightest thing. When I actually stop and think about it, I realize that I am running on 5hrs of sleep and have been going non stop 95% of the time that I’ve been awake. From the time that I wake up to the time that you get ready and go to bed. From morning to night my brain has been on high alert focusing on what is in front of you and thinking about what you have to do next. 

When you get to this point it’s not healthy for anyone. It’s not good for the people around you and most importantly it’s not good for you. What good are you when you are burnt out trying to accomplish your goals and always on the go. You need to take time out to care for yourself. 

I try not to get to that point where I hate the world and want to crawl in a whole to sleep. But honestly sometimes things get in the way and I end up right there. 

As an introvert I recharge  when I’m by myself and have some time alone.  These are some of the things that I love doing to recharge  and refresh so I can go again. 

This is what works for me and you might find it helpful but it’s important to find what you love doing to recharge so you can be your best self.

I Take a shower

Although i take a shower every night, it is usually in and out then on to the next thing or go to sleep right away. But when I’m taking the night or day off my showers feel different. It’s almost like your mind and body know what is coming so you clear your mind and figuratively wash everything down to drain. When I get out I feel so light and fresh. I take the time to lotion my whole body, put on my robe and get ready for the rest of the evening or just stay in my robe. It’s my time so i can do what i want. As I get dressed or drink tea or light a candle I like to have to light Jazz music playing in the background. This might sound strange but it helps to keep my mind from wandering back to work.  

I light a candle or 2

Honestly I love candles. When I light a candle it’s like instantly the world is a better place. I don’t know why I just love candles especially if they have a mild scent like lavender or vanilla or something that is not too overpowering. Currently my favourite candle is from the Neob Niagra. Their Lavender candle is amazing. the subtle lavender smell is so relaxing.

photo of
Square Glorious Lavender Candle from https://neobniagara.com/collection

Drink some tea 

Tea is another one of those thing that just calm me. I also love a cup of Match Latte. Caffeine does not affect me that much so having a cup at night does not keep me awake. I dont know what it is about tea, maybe its the heat, but i find it very soothing.

Watch something funny 

I generally stay away from TV shows because once i fins one that i like and there are a few seasons already out its hard to break away when i could be doing something productive. I like to watch movies. Sometimes I watch it by myself or the people I’m living with. I am calm and present by this point so if i am with people i am more fun to be around and not always thinking about going to do the next thing. 

Sleep, sleep sleep

Its quite obvious but i cant finish without saying this. Sleep. Sleep is needed for your body to repair itself and . its important for your overall well being. If possible sleep and wake up without an alarm. When I wake up without an alarm I can just lay there and enjoy the new day before it even begins. I enjoy the morning light that fills my room and wish i can stay there. 

Remember Self-care is important and everyone should take the time and space they need to take care of themselves. 

Get some rest and take care of yourself. It’s good for everyone but most importantly its good for you.

-Joelle@stillsofhue

Cerave Moisturizer: Healing Dry Skin in Winter

These winter months create a whole new meaning to the word ‘dryness’. Have you ever felt like your skin was about to crack open even though you use lotion every day?  Well, if you answered yes, you are not alone. My quest for the perfect lotion started back in high school, now I’m not about to age myself but that was quite some time ago and the search felt never-ending.

I have always had an aversion to scents, and with how sensitive my skin is finding a fragrance-free formula for my lotion was an absolute must.

Now I can’t say that Cerave moisturizing cream was particularly new to me, I’ve definitely seen it before at drugstores and my everyday department store but I never picked it up, until one fateful day I carelessly tossed it in my cart and said “it can’t hurt”.

Cerave Moisturizer lotion pumping into hamds

**In love**

It was love at first glide! (technically, I guess it was love at first application, but glide sounds better, so we’ll stick with that) this application was smooth, thick, and best of all not sticky! Have you ever had those lotions where you felt like it had no substance to them? All runny and watery and virtually evaporating before your eyes? Well, not Cerave! applying it was like adding a protective invisible layer to my skin but don’t get ahead of yourself here, there’s a method to this madness.

Ever heard of transepidermal water loss?  Well, I hadn’t either, but while applying lotion after a shower I always did it on damp skin, my skin just felt better when I applied my lotion this way, so I continued to do it despite the looks of oddity I’d receive from others. 

When applying moisturizer to damp skin, it actually helps seal in moisture and helps protect its barrier. Transepidermal water loss is the amount of water that passively evaporates through the skin to the external environment.  Applying a thick moisturizer to the skin while it is still damp helps to seal in that moisturizer making for a happier skin barrier.

Ceramides help create a protective barrier for the skin, locking in moisture and preventing dryness. 

Hyaluronic acid also helps to alleviate dry skin and can aid in the ageing process by reducing fine lines and wrinkles.

So, the next time you’re out shopping and happen to come across this gold in a bottle, give it a try!

 Until next time,

Stay moisturized!

Allyson@stillsofhue

Have you tried Cerave? What you favourite lotion in the winter?

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